Constitution for the United Rays of Tampa

The patriotic folks over at Rays The Stakes have written a Ray's Constitution in honor of the 4th of July holiday. Here is how it begins:

The Preamble

We the people of the United Rays of Tampa, in order to form a more perfect fanbase, establish our legitimacy, insure the admittance of no Yankees or Red Sox fans, provide for alienated baseball groupies, promote the team at all cost (even if it means getting a mohawk), and secure yet another AL pennant do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United Rays of Tampa.

It's well done and I encourage you to read the entire text, but I fear there will be endless litigation over the 2nd Amendment Right to Bear Cowbells.